Ramblings on Family

Some issues and questions to ponder and discuss… Last night, our weekly study of the “Truth Project” discussed, among other things, the nature of family. The emotion of the topic could be clearly seen in a particular part of the video. The topic stirs deep passion in people – if you doubt this, just challenge someone’s view of family. The claws come out quickly.

What is a family? How do you define it? In our video last night, some people said freely that it didn’t matter how you were related, but how close you were to people. Close friends were defined as family. People who help us were defined as family. However, if that is true, what might that mean? Others said that we are all family. Yet others talked about family as bloodlines, essentially meaning the sharing of DNA. How do we analyze these? What does God have to say about family?

The Bible clearly references husbands and wives, parents and children as families. It even talks at length about how these families should operate. What else does it define as “family?” The “family of God” is clearly discussed in Scripture. This is based on the fact that those who know Jesus are children of God, making us all brothers and sisters. Jesus also eludes to this. When some people came to Jesus and told Him that His mother and brothers were looking for Him, Jesus responds by saying, “…Whoever does the will of My Father who is in heaven, he is My brother and sister and mother.”

Clearly we can rule out family being based on feelings. As everyone who has ever lived in any family knows, feelings can swing significantly. Imagine if family was based on how we happen to feel about someone. We would have no consistent family. People in relationships would be family, and then not family, and then family again so often we wouldn’t be able to live with ourselves. Also, while there might be some level of brotherhood with all the people of earth, or the people in a country for that matter, it is hard to hold to that definition of family based on Scripture.

So, what do we do with our “spiritual family,” and our “natural family?” Does one take precedent over the other? That was clearly the assumption of the people who came to Jesus to inform Him that His relatives were looking for Him. Jesus seems to answer in a way that turns things on their head. He seems to be saying that He (and by supposition, we should also) put as much, or more emphasis on those who are part of the family of God, and are serving as such. How do we reconcile that with what most of us feel is true?

While Scripture doesn’t see fit to give us weights and measures to come to a precise, all encompassing answer, we can see it work itself out in Scripture. While all those who know Jesus are brothers and sisters, the admonitions to acting like family are written to local Bodies, as to how they should live together. This does not diminish the very real bond we often find instantly with Believers we’ve never met. However, there is truth to the fact that if “everyone is family,” than no one is family. Trying to have a special relationship with everyone takes away the very definition of “special.”

Regardless of technicalities, Scripture is clear that our first sphere of influence (spiritually first and foremost) should be our “natural family.” Whether you see spiritual family and natural family as all part of the same unit, with differing specified roles, or if you see them as completely different but complimentary, there is one hugely significant Biblical mandate. That is commitment.

Today, if you begin having problems with your job or your friends, or your grocery store, you move on. That same thing is happening with “family.” Divorce is the very picture of this. Kids want to move away from parents, parents want to move away from kids. The same is true of spiritual families. Christians are quick to pack up and move on, often based on how we feel, or how entertaining things are. I heard a pastor say recently that “boredom is by far the biggest reason people leave their church families.” I don’t know how that can be proved or disproved, but I know it is a major factor with many people.

What family or families do you belong to? How committed are you to those relationships? Are you being what you should be with the family God wants you to be actively involved in?

“Significant” Prayer?

I was talking with a pastor friend today, and the topic of group prayer came up. We found ourselves discussing what makes some prayer groups and prayer times seem so much more significant, meaningful, and energizing than others.

Mission trips seem to bring powerful prayer times, often every day of the trips. Retreats, prayer during difficult times, times of new ministries, and other circumstances seem to create life-altering prayer times. However, over time, both of us have been part of prayer groups who’s prayer times seemed to be always filled with the presence and guidance of the Spirit, and would impact the participants all day or all week, with no seemingly outside reason. Why?

Bringing a list of needs to God of people around us is a fine thing to do. I believe God wants us to lift up those who have needs. However, even doing this it seems, can either be life-giving, or just something we do. Again, what makes the difference?


Need To Be Close To God

Whether in my personal prayer time, or in groups, there is a real difference between doing what I “should”, or what would be good to do, and coming to God because I NEED to be near Him. At least for me, the more I am aware of my need to be close to Him, the more powerful the time. If my time with the Lord is just a phone call to God to ask Him to do me a favor, it will probably be unrewarding, will lack any power, and might not even be real Biblical prayer. However, if I come to God to be near Him, to cry out to Him, to praise Him because I NEED TO PRAISE HIM, everything is different, even if I am talking to Him about you.

A friend described to me what it was like to parachute for his first time. He said he was pretty nervous about it when he got to the airport. He met with the instructor he would be jumping with. As they talked, discussing the event with this expert was very significant to him, and he described this time in glowing terms. It gave him confidence, and a sense of “rightness” about what was coming. He was going to be entirely dependent on his instructor through the entire jump, and this conversation gave him the confidence that all would work out as it should.

This is often the missing ingredient in our prayers. Each and every day is an adventure, and we have the best guide the world has ever seen. When we all come together to be close to God, with a driving sense that we NEED to be close to God, we are overwhelmed by His presence, and we are changed in our hearts. This is true in my personal prayer life. It is also a great reality when a group of people get together to draw close to God, with a sense of need. He meets us in a powerful and special way.

Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? - GOD KNOWS...

I found the following comment by the president of Yale regarding the recent Yale grad student's murder, germane and apropos to our recent discussion of EVIL in last evenings tour in the Truth Project. Having a daughter or similar age and high academic capability & mental acuity, I found this act particularly alarming and despicable.

The president of Yale, Richard Levin, released a statement shortly after the arrest, saying Clark's employment history gave no indication he was capable of such a crime. ( the natural man is a walking time bomb, a inactive terrorist cell, waiting to be activated and deployed by the Father of Lies, the King of all Murderers.)

"This incident could have happened in any city, in any university, or in any workplace. It says more about the dark side of the human soul than it does about the extent of security measures," Levin said in a message sent to the Yale community.

This type of incident will not happen in the City of God....the New Jerusalem. But it is all to commonplace in the city of man! Babylon the Great.

Revelation 21

Of The New Heaven and Earth

¹Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth; for the first heaven and the first earth passed away, and there is no longer any sea.

²And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, made ready as a bride adorned for her husband.

³And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, "Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them,

⁴and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away."

⁵And He who sits on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new " And He said, "Write, for these words are faithful and true."

⁶Then He said to me, " It is done I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end I will give to the one who thirsts from the spring of the water of life without cost.

⁷"He who overcomes will inherit these things, and I will be his God and he will be My son.

⁸" But for the cowardly and unbelieving and abominable and murderers and immoral persons and sorcerers and idolaters and all liars, their part will be in the lake that burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death."

²²I saw no temple in it, for the Lord God the Almighty and the Lamb are its temple.

²³And the city has no need of the sun or of the moon to shine on it, for the glory of God has illumined it, and its lamp is the Lamb.

²⁴⁾The nations will walk by its light, and the kings of the earth will bring their glory into it.

²⁵In the daytime (for there will be no night there)its gates will never be closed;

²⁶and they will bring the glory and the honor of the nations into it;

²⁷and nothing unclean, and no one who practices abomination and lying, shall ever come into it, but only those whose names are written in the Lamb's book of life.

Be of good courage brethren. Look to the Scriptures for strength and sustenance, fortitude and encouragement.

These are the times that try men's souls!

He is able to keep that which I have committed unto Him against that day.”

To Tell the Truth

Most of us feel like we are pretty truthful. We also tend to think that we have a pretty good handle on what is truth, and what it is not. Do you “walk in the truth?” Most of us, at least those who follow Jesus, would say yes.

Walking in truth means seeing truth clearly. It means accepting what is true. However, it also means facing, and then owning the truth. It is one thing to admit something is true if we are asked. It is another to possess and walk in that truth.

Examples of this are all around us. Several cases of “bad behavior” have been before us in the media for several months. Last week, tennis player Serena Williams chewed out a line judge at the U.S. Open, over a call she did not like. During her tirade, she told the small female judge, in the coarsest language possible, that, among other things, she was going to “shove this ball down your ____ throat.”

In the post-match interview, she said, “I don’t think I threatened her… I was in the moment… I was passionate and emotional...” Because this did nothing to squelch the outcry, she has since made more attempts to explain her behavior. She has apologized to her fans, saying that she displayed “actions outside my character.”

Now, Williams may be right that this type of outburst is not characteristic of her. What little I have seen of her play, she is a fierce competitor, but I have never seen any such outbursts or behavior. What is interesting to me, though, is the attitude of justification. While it frustrates me to hear things like, “in the moment,” and “actions outside my character,” it also resonates with me. If I’m honest, I often feel the same way about things I think or do, and want to give the same qualifications.

When our depravity shows itself, we want to take the edge off of the truth. Think about the last time your “flesh” flagrantly showed itself. Think about how you wanted to cover it up, or at least smooth it over. That desire is a desire to not walk in truth. Truth would say, “What I did was wrong, (perhaps) hurt someone else, and it happened because of the sinfulness that pollutes my very soul. I can’t say anything more.” That is truth. While most who know the Lord “know” this, we often don’t like owning, or walking in that truth.

Interestingly though, sometimes we would rather “own” that truth, than the truth brought to us by the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. That ultimate truth is that because God now lives in us, we don’t have to walk in that depravity. We have been freed from sin. However, it is sometimes easier to say to ourselves or others, “This is just a weakness I have… I really can’t do anything else… I can’t get a handle on this…” Doing this denies the greatest truth of all. Jesus died so that we would no longer walk in sinfulness, but in His righteousness and goodness. Owning that truth means walking in the truth, which means overcoming sin through His Spirit. It is strange how the most freeing truth of all time sometimes feels scary to own…

The Truth Project

Alameda Hills is watching the “Truth Project” series on Wednesday nights. The focus is on the nature of truth in various areas, and on our foundation of truth as Christians.

The series has been fun for me. Truth is a major element of what we Christians are about, and a common topic of conversation at Alameda Hills. This series gives a fresh view of applying truth in a variety of contexts that we encounter, while living on this earth.

Too often, we Christians don’t have a set grid to process what comes at us in this world. How do you make sense of situational ethics, with proclamations of science today, with a wide variety of home-grown belief systems?

I encourage any of you who are attending the series to reply (“comment”) on what has struck you so far in the series. It will be helpful for the rest of us to see what you have learned, and hopefully encourage discussion.

If you haven’t yet been, come join us at 7:00 on Wednesday nights.

Up and running again

A while back we lost our most excellent blog editor, Meggy T. While irreplaceable, we will endeavor to persevere. A belated "thank you" for your great work overseeing things here, Meggy.

As of today, we are attempting to start anew. Our intention is to maintain a level of consistency in our posts. We ask for patience in the early stages, but fully expect to be up and running at full speed soon.

Thanks. It is our intention that this blog page will encourage you, make you think, generally be a tool in growing you closer to the Lord.

Psalm 109:12-13

In a situation that looks hopeless, have you ever heard (or said yourself), "All we can do is pray"?

We have exhausted our resources. The help of man has proved futile. Our confidence is shot, our strength is waning. We are fearful. "All we can do is pray."

If prayer is our last recourse then our hope has been misplaced.

Our faith is not in our circumstances, the intelligence and strength of man, or the power of influence.

Our hope is in God. From the beginning.

He who has defeated death is the One who longs to help us in our time of need. His strength is made perfect in our weakness and He is waiting for us to surrender the cause to Him.

"Give us aid against the enemy, for the help of man is worthless. With God we will gain the victory and He will trample down our enemies." ~ Psalm 109:12-13

Let's change the song from "All we can do is pray." To"The most we can do is pray."

God's Leftovers

"For this is what the Lord says: ' They will eat and have some left over.' Then he set it before them, and they ate and had some left over, according to the word of the Lord." 2 Kings 5:43-44

A dear homeschooling friend is wanting to add more children to their family. She is concerned about adding to an already full plate and asked me how I felt the Lord has supplied us with grace, patience, and ability as He added to our family.

As I was pondering her question, I was reading in 2 Kings this morning. This verse nailed it! God's work in the life of Elisha displays His ability to turn little into plenty. The widow's oil was a small amount that was multiplied so that she was able to pay her debts and live. Twenty loaves of barley bread were made to feed a hundred men with leftovers.

As we have followed His leading, our family has grown and He has supplied us with the grace, wisdom, organization, patience, time, and energy that we need. For that I am thankful. But the "leftovers" are the best part. The extra things like .....

date night every week
desserts with dinner
more clothes than I know what to do with
sleeping in on Sunday morning
soccer, fencing, and instruments
books and games a plenty
the unique love of each precious child

This good life is nothing we deserve. God took our little bit of faith and multiplied it as He has made our lives richer with each blessing. Continually He shows us that if we will trust Him, He will more than supply our needs.

Conversation with Death

If death were to talk to you on this Good Friday, how would that conversation go? For those who know and walk with the Living King, how should it go?

Check out this article.

Is The Cross About Me?

This is "Good Friday." The day we remember Jesus dying on a cross, for our sins. Christians all around the world today will be thinking about this, remembering this, focusing on this. However, what does it mean for us to focus on this, to ponder it today?

A recurring theme of mine is the change in the heart of Christians in our culture. It used to be that the emphasis of Christians, of churches, of the Christian community, was more centered on God, and on Christ. Today, the Christian community strives to be "relevant." This MAY be a good goal, and certainly there have been good things to come from this. However, it has changed our focus in a small, but significant way.

All things Biblical, or, "Christian," tend to be filtered through the sieve of, "How does this impact my life?" That is truly a good question. However, constant focus on that reduces the things of God to things of us, and it sometimes reduces God to the great big Santa Claus in the sky. And, even from a selfish position, that perspective will not transform our lives.

I believe that it is when we focus on nothing but Him, and His position, that we are most lifted up. Getting eyes off of self, and on to God, moves us into His presence, where transformation takes place. We are "attaching ourselves to His wagon," so to speak, and are therefore exalted to be with Him when we focus on Him. The idea is to focus on His Highness, not our lowness.

The Cross

Today is an obvious time to focus on Jesus and the cross. Let's get caught up in the glory and magnificence of Jesus, and the greatest love ever displayed in the history of the world. Be amazed and awed and inspired. Let it draw you to Jesus, because this event tells us a massive amount about who He is. Things that draw me in and make me want to get close to Him, and be in His presence. Today, I want to learn about Jesus through His work on the cross.

Not Under The Weather

If I could choose I would set the temperature at a sunny 75 degrees with a scheduled storm once a week and snow only at Christmas time and when the Wings were here.

I love the summers in CO and really the winters aren't too bad either. It's spring that I have trouble with. It gets all nice and warm for days and days and then WHAM!! Snow. And it doesn't stop either. Last year it kept snowing in May when my friends in AR had their gardens well underway.

Yesterday we had soccer games scheduled as well as general birthday fun. But it was snowy and rainy and cold and everything was cancelled. As we were eating breakfast, my husband prayed something that caught my attention. It went something like this...."Thank you God for another unexpected day of rest."

I hadn't thought of it like that. What do I have to complain about when I have a cozy warm house full of food, electricity, and every modern convenience? And even though our outside activities were cancelled, it is not as though I had nothing to do.

I need to learn to cooperate with God's plan for my day. I need to rest in His sovereignty to command the weather as He pleases. I need to adjust my thoughts and be thankful. Cancelled things will be rescheduled, the sun will shine again, and the garden will get planted eventually. The busyness of life will never cease, but days of rest are few.

So yesterday we spent the day hibernating. Playing games, watching movies, cooking, reading, and being together. I enjoyed the break from the usual busy Saturday routine. My son had a good birthday and it was restful indeed.

"Thank you God for another unexpected day of rest."

Book Study

I'm excited to share this new book with you.

Come join me in a new online book study. I think it'll be fun to review this very practical book together.

Raising Godly Tomatoes by L Elizabeth Krueger is a hands-on parenting book written by a mom of 10 children ranging in age from 7 to 27.

The pace is slow so it will be NOT be overwhelming. We will only cover 1 chapter a week. And PLEASE don't lurk...just jump right in and join us.Check it out here.

More On The Celebration Of Christmas

Now that Christmas is over, I want to address this issue for one last time this year.

This year, I heard far more complaints about Christmas from Christians than I ever have before. Commercialism, Santa, parents "lying to their kids," and various other issues are moving Christians to ask if we should be celebrating this holiday at all, or at least celebrating it "like the world celebrates it."

Sandy has already given a book review on this topic. While I have not read that book, Sandy's review tells me that I would like the gist of the book, most significantly, as it lines up with our sermon series on Christmas this year. Christmas is a time of celebration. I am glad that our culture still celebrates goodness and giving while we are celebrating the birth of Christ.

A little too late for this year's debate, a friend sent me a link, out of the blue, to an article on this topic, by R.C. Sproul. He relates those well intended Christmas nay-sayers to one Ebenezer Scrooge. Read the article here and let us know what you think.

The Church Family

Last night at the Christmas program I told everyone that I wouldn't be at church today. You see, Mike and Meggy are shooting a wedding at another church and wrestling Babyest during the service isn't much fun by myself.

Before bed I was reading A God Centered Church by Henry and Melvin Blackaby. He quoted Eph 2:19-22

"Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and aliens, but fellow citizens with God's people and members of God's household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone. In him the whole building is joined together and rises to become a holy temple in the Lord. And in him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit."

As I read this coupled with Blackaby's thoughts, the whole idea of my church being my family hit me anew. We're a family of brothers and sisters in Christ brought together to love each other, help each other, and honor God. Did we really want to stay home and watch a church service on tv when we could be with our family in person?

When we entered the church my pastor said "Welcome!" with surprise in his eyes. Several family members told me how glad they were that I changed my mind. We sat on the front row and enjoyed the singing, the message, and the prayer time. A little fellowship followed with one more chance to say "Merry Christmas!"

Shortly after we got home the phone rang. It was one of our senior ladies calling to tell me how glad she was that I made the extra effort to come. She told me how the children always bless her and said that I was a good mom.

No, Babyest wasn't wonderfully behaved and needed to be taken out twice. The littlest kids were squirmy and didn't want to pay attention. But the inconvenience was more than made up for by the love we received. Look what we would've missed if we'd stayed home.

I will close with some Blackaby thoughts....

"God has called us to join the family gathering and enjoy the benefits of that relationship. In God's family we will receive strength, encouragement, and much-needed fellowship. We will grow in wisdom and maturity as we benefit from those who have walked with God for many years. We will find security in the family's watch care of our life and respond to its comfort and accountability. More than anything else, God our Father manifests Hie presence in special ways when two or three are gathered together."

Come and Behold Him

Introducing...my new book!

I've been pondering the propriety of our various Christmas traditions wondering if I'm caving to commercialism in the fun of it all. I took it to the Lord in prayer.

The very next day I was browsing the shelves of the used book store at the public library and my eyes fell upon this....

Perhaps I am premature to recommend it since I'm only on pg 31 but so far I have enjoyed every page. It is not divided into chapters but more like short readings....minus the overuse of poetry thank you very much. The first reading deals with decorating our homes. Here's a short excerpt....

"If God commissioned angels to roll back the night and fill it with blazing light, if God provided a mighty celestial choir to serenade a few startled shepherds, if God graced the heavens with a miracle star, if God went to all this trouble to open our eyes to His entry into our world, then we needn't apologize for festooning our home with a few seasonal reminders!"

He encourages us to open our homes up to our neighbors saying, "It is a witness to our neighbors when they see a believer actually happy about life!"

Jack Hayford has a style that is neither ultra sensitive nor overly intellectual. There's a "smile" to his writing that makes you feel like you're enjoying a visit with a friendly neighbor. There is an air of seriousness mixed with fun as he uses Scripture, song lyrics, and personal examples to show us practical ways to Come And Behold Him.